I’ve done it. I’ve discovered the fountain of youth. I have succeeded where Ponce de Leon failed.The fountain is in southern California. But, there are no sacred waters to drink; no special potions to swallow. All you have to do is move here.
Don’t believe me? Ask anybody out here who is not a native. When did you arrive in Los Angeles? They will likely say…”Oh, I haven’t been here that long. I think it was around 1989.” And you will say, “Dude, that was 26 years ago.” And they will say, “But I look and feel the same as the day I arrived.”
There are several reasons I think L.A. is the fountain of youth: everybody exercises, lots of sunshine, emphasis on healthy eating habits, nobody smokes cigarettes, or lays in the sun, plastic surgery, liposuction, and the number one reason…no seasons.
That’s right, you may celebrate your birthday every year, but without any seasons, there is no sense of time passing. No changing of the leaves on a palm tree. No cancelled school days from snow. No cold winter’s nights in front of a fire. No spring awakening with plants and grass sprouting from the ground, Every day is the same!
So if you want to live forever and never change, come to L.A. or San Diego. Give me a call, I can recommend some nice neighborhoods.
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Richard Allan Jones is the author of the comic/adventure novel, “DRAFTED” and the soon to be released thriller, “Identity Check.”